Wednesday 19 April 2017

SO YOU THINK YOUR 2017 SUCKS?


Ah, a new year. There's always so much excitement and hope around the prospect of a new beginning. New goals, new adventures, more happiness, less drama - that's exactly what 2017 is going to be like, right? Wrong. By this point in the year, however, reality kicks in and you realise it's probably not going to be a field of roses. You get back into your schedule and life goes on as per usual. What happened to 2017, this is practically 2016S (Non-iphone users will probably not get that. Haha, simpletons).



Hoping to go to the gym 4 times a week becomes hoping you'll even get out of bed. Your dinners of lean meat and veggies becomes Krispy Kreme and wine (Wine is grapes, grapes are fruit, therefore wine is fruit, right?) Your goal of going to all your lectures for the week becomes your new goal of actually remembering what modules you have (Or even your degree name. I'm pretty sure it's a bachelor of something or is it a degree in being a bachelor? At this point I don't even know). Protein shakes become black label bottles and your new definition of adventure is skipping a lecture to Netflix (13 Reasons Why has got me Netflixing all day err'day.).



All things considered, I'm here to tell you that your 2017 is not nearly as bad as you think it is - no, seriously! Compared to these people, you're pretty much living the dream. I know it's a popular saying to be grateful for what you have because some people have it worse but compared to these people your 2017 is lit AF. Here you have it folks, the top 3 people who are having a worse 2017 than you.



1. NORTH KOREA'S KIM JONG-UN


You would think having a girl's name would make his year bad enough but that's isn't even the half of it. I won't lie Kim Jong-un does have things pretty good what with being president to the world's most secretive nation and one of the only communist nations remaining, North Korea. He also kinda looks like a Koala bear (Awww!). Even that can't take away from the fact that when it comes to Intercontinental Ballistic Missiles (ICBM) and anything nuclear, he's not the smartest person out there. Kim thinks he's so cool with his nuclear toys and defying international laws and warnings, which is what makes his latest fail even more epic. On April 15, North Koreans had a massive parade in their capital, Pyongjang, to celebrate the birth of the state founder. A day later they launched a missile which apparently blew up immediately after takeoff. LOL. Epic fail. 'Nuff said.


2. TURKEY'S PRIME MINISTER


Looks like Turkey's Prime minister, Binali Yıldırım, might be out of the job. Wait what? On April 15, 2017, Turkey held a referendum to change its constitution into one which gives the president even more power, and abolishes the role of PM. More people voted in favour of the referendum, with 51.7% of the 47.5 million votes being "Yes" votes.This means Turkey now goes from being a parliamentary system to a powerful presidential one. Why did people vote "Yes"? Seemingly President Recep Tayyip Erdogan has led the country through much economic growth and development in the past decade, with prospects to do that at an even greater scale and extent in the future. Wait, then why would anyone vote "No"? President Erdogan is on the other hand often seen as a power hungry dictator who enforces his beliefs and views on his country. If last years coup d'etat is anything to go by, Turkish people are largely divided on their view of the President (Hmm, doesn't this sound familiar, South Africa?). On top of that, the way the referendum was carried out is highly controversial due to the "No" campaign being highly restricted, media coverage imbalanced, ballots without official stamps being accepted and even claims of intimidation and threats of violence. Yep, life for the prime minister and the anti-Erdogan camp kinda sucks now. 

via GIPHY


3. SYRIANS

Do I even have to explain further? Unless you've been living under a rock, you would know that 2017 marks the 6th year of the Syrian war. Here's an (EXTREMELY) brief and watered-down summary of the Syrian war thus far:- 2011, peaceful Arab Spring protests. Syrian president, Bashar al-Assad's government kill and imprison hundreds of protestors. Free Syrian army, rebel group against gov, formed. ISIS, extremist terrorist group, formed. Russia, Iraq and Iran (majority Shia populations), and Lebonan's Hezbollah support Assad. US and Sunni-majority Arab states (Saudi Arabia, Turkey) against Assad. That brings us to present day. But what's new? All this time the US has minimised involvement in the Syrian war by rather focusing on fighting ISIS as opposed to getting involved with Assad's government. This year that seems to have changed. A recent chemical attack by the Syrian government prompted the US, led by president Trump, to launch 59 Tomahawk cruise missiles at a Syrian air force base on April 7, 2017. This is the first direct attack by the US and could quite possible be the turning point of the war. Either way, with over 465 000 Syrians killed in the fighting, and no end to it in sight, Syrians are undoubtedly having a worse 2017 than you.



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There you have it, proof that your 2017 is not nearly as bad as you think it is! Did I miss out on someone having a terrible 2017? BTW, anyone know what ISIS has been up to? They've been awfully quiet. Post a comment and let me know what's up.


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